This is an Owl

This is an owl. I don’t know what the latin species name is, but it’s probably something like awesomesauceus coolus flyus wizeus fuckyouzus ifyouzus dontis agreeus. If you do not like them, you’re probably not friends with me and Tiffany, but we are open minded and you can join the fan club if you too keep an open mind to how cool they are.

Not only are they cool and wear headphones even though they have supersonic hearing so good they can hear a butterfly burp two countries away, but they are also super scary. So scary that I almost didn’t make this blog website. The only thing preventing me from throwing this laptop out the window in fear is that I also know that owls are pretty much the cutest thing imagineable. For example:

And on top of being cool and creepy/scary and having won the academy award for cutest animal in history like a millenium years in a row, they are also super stars of the big and small screen:

How many birds do you know that can count, not to mention all the way up to three and eat an entire tootsie pop? Exactly, 1. The owl. Someone’s been paying attention.

And we all know that that little shit Harry Potter, bless his little heart, had pretty much no powers without his wise winged friend, what kind of bird was that again? Oh yeah, I almost forgot, except I didn’t, it was an OWL.

Tiffany: I love you and I’m proud of you and this website is for you. You’re magical and cool and creepy/scary and super good at counting and also kind of a media star in my eyes, and you can see really awesomely well at night, and you’re also super duper wise and otherworldly hot. I’m lucky to have you in my life. Please post here whenever you may be inclined.

Yours truly,

Charles (aka a fellow Owl Fan).